Percy Forgets to Wear His Pants (With Pockets!)
by just fading lights
Summary: If Riptide always returns to Percy's pocket when he loses it, where will it go when he accidentally wears pocketless pants! Fighting monsters has never been so complicated! Quick one-shot for all your Percabeth needs (:


**Hey guys! It's been a few years since I've been a part of Fanfiction, but I stumbled across this random story while I was looking through my past files. I decided to finally share it, although it's a bit dated. Feel free to leave a review (:**

Percy was breathing hard. He was so angry with himself. How the hell had he gotten into this situation? What in the name of the gods had made this happen? Percy collapsed in a park bench to catch his breath. Sweat dripped down his neck and blood rushed up to his face. Never again. This would never happen ever again.

As he struggled to talk, Percy managed to get out a shaky, "Annabeth… why... did…. we… just.. do… that…?"

When he mustered up the strength to look up, he saw piercing grey eyes staring at him in disbelief.

"Percy, if you're incapable of running even three blocks around Central Park, how do you expect to fight monsters in battle?"

It had been 8 months since the Giant War, and the world had been surprisingly stable _and_ free of monster attacks. Annabeth had somehow convinced him that he needed to begin exercising, as if the last year hadn't been enough of a stressful workout. That's why, on a pleasant autumn afternoon, Percy found himself decked out in a tight jacket and short running shorts—something he would never think to wear in a million years. Annabeth had picked out the outfit and forced him to put it on (he swore Annabeth must've picked up charm speaking from Piper or something).

That's why he suddenly found himself lying on a bench underneath a tall green tree in Central Park after running for a full 13 minutes.

Percy ignored Annabeth's jab at his stamina and used his most vulnerable voice to say, "Annabeth, I can't do this anymore. I think—," his voice cracked convincingly, "—I think I might die."

Annabeth rolled her eyes, not buying Percy's attempt to get out of running. "I'm being serious, Percy. How have you survived for all these years without being able to run even 2 miles?"

Folding his arms across his chest, Percy pouted at Annabeth. "You know, most of us only need to be able to run when we're in actual danger. What's the point of wasting your energy when a second later, some monster can attack you when you're down? Also, I'm pretty sure most guys wouldn't be able to even run a mile in these terrible shorts. No manly guy would want to be caught dead in _spandex_ for that long,"

Percy said the last few words with disgust, "besides, why run when you can eat blue ice cream? Percy pointed across the street at a new ice cream shop featuring the limited time "Smurf" ice cream.

Annabeth rolled her eyes at Percy again. "I'll have you know that I bought those clothes at a store for runners, and the salesperson told me that all the marathoners are wearing that when they run. It's made with high quality compression polyester that makes you more aerodynamic and lighter so you decrease your abili—"

"That's great to know Annabeth! Thanks for all the super useful information that I definitely plan on using in the future! Now can we please eat some ice cream now? It says that Smurf has marshmallows in it!"

Annabeth was about to agree reluctantly when a dark shadow appeared behind her. Without even thinking about it, she spun around with her knife drawn, ready to stab at whatever had mysteriously approached them. Unsurprisingly, it was a group of telekhines that had decided now was a good time to attack two unsuspecting demigods. With a quick glance at the enemy, Percy and Annabeth were confident that this would be an easy job.

They stood back to back and prepared for the enemy to make the first move. As the first telekhine made a mad scramble towards them, Percy reached into his pocket to whip out his handy-dandy pen when…

Oh no….

Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no…

… his hands were only met with the smooth fabric of his SPANDEX SHORTS. He couldn't believe this. Riptide was nowhere to be found, and he was going to die because Annabeth had decided that he should wear "proper running clothes" when jogging.

As he felt his brain spiraling because he had just survived two wars, fought off thousands of monsters, lived through the worst things ever, and now his doom was a pair of spandex shorts, all he could think of was what the description of his obituary would read:

"Perseus Jackson passed away on September 30, 2017 because his weapon did not appear during an attack on him and girlfriend, Annabeth Chase, while he was wearing a pair of-unfortunately pocketless-spandex running shorts. His presence will be missed."

He stood, paralyzed. All he could think of now were his mother's delicious chocolate chip cookies and the strawberry fields at camp. The sounds of monsters dying could be heard faintly behind his hazy stupor.

"... Percy? Percy! PERCY!"

Percy snapped out of his thoughts when a burning sensation came across his face. Annabeth had just slapped him incredibly hard.

She was covered in gold dust, and the telekhines were nowhere to be found. While Percy stood there in a catatonic state, Annabeth had been defeating all the monsters. He felt embarrassed now that he hadn't done anything to help her.

"Annabeth! These shorts you got me don't even have pockets, so I couldn't find Riptide, and I was so lost without it, and I can't believe that you just killed all those monsters while I just stood here while doing nothing, and I—"

He was cut off by Annabeth pressing her lips firmly to his.

"Oh, Seaweed Brain. It's a good thing you're cute because you sure don't have anything else going for you."

He was going to argue vehemently against her statement when she reached towards him and pulled Riptide out of his jacket… pocket.

Percy was so shocked that all he could do was form a small "o" with his mouth. Annabeth smiled as she mockingly wiggled Riptide between her fingers. Percy reached up to take it back, but she took off running at full speed.

"Nice try, Kelp Head, but you'll have to catch me first!"

Percy and Annabeth walked home that afternoon carrying matching Smurf ice cream cones.

And yes, the marshmallow-ice cream combination was delicious.

 **Smurf ice cream is actually a flavor in my town and it's the absolute BEST. Hope y'all enjoyed this quick read, and have a great weekend!**


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